TGIF: Ed Rondthaler on the nonsense of English spelling June 25, 2010
Posted by Jill (@bonnjill) in Fun stuff, TGIF.1 comment so far
English spelling is a vexing problem for most learners of English. Why does the English language have so many words that are difficult to spell? The main reason is that English has 1,100 different ways to spell its 44 separate sounds, more than any other language. This video, which I discovered thanks to one of the folks I follow on Twitter, features typographist, spelling champion, and chairman of the American Literacy Council Dr. Ed Rondthaler pointing out the nonsense of English spelling. Enjoy!
I’m Comic Sans, Asshole June 18, 2010
Posted by Jill (@bonnjill) in Fun stuff.1 comment so far
I know a lot of people don’t like the Comic Sans font. I myself don’t get all the hate, because I find it to be a pretty legible font. That said, I usually stick with Arial or Times New Roman in my translations because I know a lot of people don’t like crazy fonts. I hope Jost reads this and reposts it to the Toolkit newsletter. Michelle Rafter at WordCount just included it in her recommended reading post, and I have to say it is absolutely brilliant. Here’s what she had to say about it:
McSweeney’s runs a regular column called Short Imagined Monologues where the writer assumes the persona of some real or fictitious character to expound on a particular point. This week’s installment from designer/writer Mike Lacher, will make the font fanatic in you smile. (Warning: language may not be suitable for work.)
So I hope you all enjoy I’m Comic Sans, Asshole as much as I did!
TGIF: How to swear in English June 18, 2010
Posted by Jill (@bonnjill) in Fun stuff, TGIF.add a comment
It’s been a while since I’ve had a TGIF video on the blog. I just haven’t found anything worth posting recently. Thanks to Fidus interpres, a German to Portuguese translator based in Rheinbach, Germany, for posting this video originally. As Fabio explains, “It’s an English lesson given by a Korean teacher who initiates students into the ‘metaphysics’ of four-letter words – he even explains graphically what an asshole is. The man is really good! The YouTube video has been translated from Korean into English so that you can enjoy the teacher’s insights – even if the subtitles are too difficult to follow.” Enjoy!
A Modern Language Analyst by Everette E. Jordan May 18, 2010
Posted by Jill (@bonnjill) in ATA, Fun stuff, Translation.3 comments
As most of you regular readers know, I am moving in a few weeks and am purging my belongings. I have almost finished going through 8 years of ATA Chronicles and just found this little gem. For those of you who didn’t get the pleasure to hear him live, Everette E. Jordan was the keynote speaker at the ATA’s 44th Annual Conference in Phoenix, Arizona on November 6, 2003. He was the Director of the National Virtual Translation Center at the time. The NVTC is a federal center that helps translate a backlog of documents for the CIA, FBI, and other government agencies. I have since become disillusioned with the NVTC (and he is no longer the director there), but in my eyes Mr. Jordan was, is and always will be a rock star. He speaks a ton of different languages and is a very poised speaker (not to mention good-looking and a really nice guy who is devoted to his family). I have a framed photo of us from that conference in my office. At the time ATA and the federal government were really working hard to establish a relationship, and the NVTC was trying to recruit linguists for their herculean effort of translating the backlogs of documents.
Anyway, back to Mr. Jordan. He was an outstanding keynote speaker. In fact, I think this is the only keynote speech that has ever been reprinted in the ATA Chronicle. To end his speech, he recited a poem he and a colleague had written styled after the famous Gilbert and Sullivan song, I am the Very Model of a Modern Major General, to describe the job that a government language analyst performs on a daily basis. It brought the crowd to its feet.
I am the very model of a modern language analyst
I scan and translate info that the average person might have missed.
I’m quite adept at understanding language spoken quite absurd
If modesty permits me, I’m a master of the garbled wordI’m very well acquainted, too, with leaders quite political
And deal with situations from the mundane to the critical
I’ve heard the best and all the rest and dabbled in analysis
While trying to avoid the dreaded translator paralysis.I’d like to think my studies have equipped me to work miracles
To tackle concepts ranging from the humorous to lyrical
I’ve met and mastered every grammar point designed to trip me, all
The adjectival short-form passive future participials.It’s safe to say I know my subjects by their name without a doubt
I keep them on a list to say what’s hot, what’s not, what’s in, what’s out
My scientific knowledge must be stunningly meticulous
My slang and techno-jargon, all stupendously ridiculous.For all and any question you encounter in this lurking trade
Consider me a living, breathing, walking, talking, language aid.
So when you need someone to translate what mere mortals might have missed,
Just call on me, the model of a modern language analyst.
If you want to read the entire Keynote Address, you can read it on pages 9-11 of the January 2004 issue of the ATA Chronicle, which can be found on the ATA website. However, you must be an ATA member to access old issues of the Chronicle online.
Subject: Fwd: FW: Experianced Linguist Ready to Work! April 6, 2010
Posted by Jill (@bonnjill) in Business practices, Fun stuff.2 comments
The following e-mail has been making the rounds. Thought I would share it with you all to brighten your day. The e-mail tells you to scroll to the bottom, but I have flipped it here to make it easier to read in blog format. Enjoy!
Subject: Fwd: FW: Experianced Linguist Ready to Work!
Names have been changed, to protect the innocent.
________________________________
From: Joricho Muachos
To: Linguistic Resources Coordinator
Sent: Thu, April 1, 2010 2:52:03 PM
Subject: Experianced Linguist Ready to Work!
Greetings Ms. Linguistic Resources Coordinator,
I hope this email finds you well! I was given your name by a colleague of mine in reference to making myself available to work with Your Company. I’m primarily an English to Portuguese translator but also can do revision and proofreading as well. Can you let me know what we need to have me start working for Your Company?
Regards,
Joricho Muachos
Professional Portuguese Translator
________________________________
From: Joricho Muachos
Sent: Monday, April 05, 2010 10:09 AM
To: Linguistic Resources Coordinator
Subject: Re: Experianced Linguist Ready to Work!
Hello Ms. Linguistic Resources Coordinator,
Can you please advise on what steps are needed to start work with Your Company. Money has been very scarce lately and my Mule Milosh is almost without feed.
Regards,
Joricho Muachos
Professional Portuguese Translator
________________________________
From: Linguistic Resources Coordinator
To: Joricho Muachos
Sent: Mon, April 5, 2010 10:43:15 AM
Subject: RE: Experianced Linguist Ready to Work!
Hi Joricho,
Thank you for your email. If you would like to be considered for work with our Company, please send me your CV. I will review it and see if you
qualify to undergo our translation testing process.
Best,
Linguistic Resources Coordinator
________________________________
From: Joricho Muachos
Sent: Monday, April 05, 2010 2:51 PM
To: Linguistic Resources Coordinator
Subject: Re: Experianced Linguist Ready to Work!
Hello Linguistic Resources Coordinator,
Attached is my resume. I would like to breifly summarize it for you.
In my earlier years I spend time as both a Goat Herder and a Mule Whisperer. As unorthodox as this sounds both of these professions are highly regarded in my country. Mule whispering is not a skill but a gift from our lord. It is with this blessing I can speak the thoughts of mules and become their intimate friend. Soon after whispering to many a mules I decided to shift my expertise to Goat Herding. In this job I showed the
goats where to go. If one got sick or was slow I had to beat it death with a rock so not to slow the rest of the herd down.
Thanks,
Joricho
________________________________
From: Linguistic Resources Coordinator
To: Joricho Muachos
Sent: Mon, April 5, 2010 4:04:36 PM
Subject: RE: Experianced Linguist Ready to Work!
Hi Joricho,
Thank you for you CV. You have a lot of very interesting experiences. However, Our Company requires that all of our translators have a university degree. They also must have 5 years of translation experience and provide 2 end-client references. Therefore, you are unfortunately not a candidate for working with us.
Thank you for you time and have a nice day.
Best,
Linguistic Resources Coordinator
________________________________
From: Joricho Muachos
Sent: Monday, April 05, 2010 4:22 PM
To: Linguistic Resources Coordinator
Subject: Re: Experianced Linguist Ready to Work!
Linguistic Resources Coordinator,
This is most dissappointing to hear. Someone told me translation was an easy way to make additional money for my new film “The Quiet Mule who Spoke Loudly one time because he was Naseous that Day”. If this doesn’t pan out its back to Goat Herding. Do you think if I use more business words in my resume like instead of “Telling Goats where to go” to say “Managed a team of 148 Goats” might help some of my future job potential? Can a Mule that I’ve whispered to count as a reference? I know you cannot understand them but I can tell you what they are saying. One of my Mule Whispering clients is the most famous Mule breeder in all of Europe for our lords sake!
I want to move to the united states but the need for Goat Herders and Mule Whisperers is small which worries me. Also my personal Mule will not be able to come because of your laws. I know you see a lot of resumes and anything to help me make mine better would be appreciated! Maybe i can give you a free Mule whispering lesson in return! 🙂
Joricho.
Übersetz das doch mal kurz March 12, 2010
Posted by Jill (@bonnjill) in Business practices, Fun stuff, German culture, Translation.1 comment so far
The German radio channel WDR3 featured a commentary yesterday about the work of translators that you German-speaking readers might enjoy hearing (warning: it’s in German). The title is Übersetz das doch mal kurz (Can you translate this quickly for me?). The speaker talks about how people expect translators to work quickly and compares translation and dental work, which I think is a good comparison. After all, no one expects a dentist to quickly fill a cavity at a low rate – and people expect dentists to know what they are doing because they have had the training. Enjoy!
And, thanks to Roland Grefer, here is a link to the MP3 in case you want to save it.
TGIF: Love in any language February 12, 2010
Posted by Jill (@bonnjill) in Fun stuff, TGIF.4 comments
I have loved this song since we sang it in high school – accompanied by sign language interpreters. Since Valentine’s Day is this weekend I thought it was only fitting. I hope you enjoy it and have a great weekend.
TGIF: Things we (Americans) say wrong February 5, 2010
Posted by Jill (@bonnjill) in Fun stuff, TGIF.3 comments
This video will probably make most native and non-native speakers’ heads spin, but I found it pretty amusing. As translators I hope you enjoy it as well. Enjoy your weekend! Thanks to Screw You!, an interesting blog for freelance writers that writes about bottom-feeding rates and the vendors who try to get away with paying freelance writers abominably low rates. One recent job that was featured offered $0.005 a word. And you thought translation job bids were bad!
On the swabish railway – EU Commissioner Günther Oettinger February 4, 2010
Posted by Jill (@bonnjill) in Fun stuff, German culture.2 comments
Several of my German colleagues alerted me to this rather humorous piece in the Frankfurter Rundschau entitled “Well done, Günther: On the swabish railway.” Günther Oettinger is a German politician and member of the Christian Democratic Union party (CDU). He was appointed as an EU Commissioner in the European Commission on October 24, 2009. He recently received a lot of criticism and ridicule when he announced that English would be the working language of the Commission – and then held an atrociously articulated speech in English that no one could understand. The joke in the article above is that he needs ghostwriters and that those ghostwriters also do a terrible job with English. The links below the article to other “speeches” are just as enjoyable. Enjoy!
TGIF: German coffeemaker commercial January 29, 2010
Posted by Jill (@bonnjill) in Fun stuff, TGIF.2 comments
If you are anything like me you have a deep appreciation for a fine cup of coffee. You don’t need to understand German to appreciate this commercial. Enjoy and have a great weekend! I promise to actually post a real blog post next week. I’ve been busy with life in the meantime…
Musings from an overworked translator 