Bonus TGIF: Samuel Jackson reads Go the F*ck to Sleep June 16, 2011

This is just too hilarious not to share with you all. This book was written by Adam Mansbach and narrated by “the ultra-talented Samuel L. Jackson.” It’s just brilliant.

If you are at all sensitive to foul language I suggest you skip this one. Everyone else – enjoy! I can go to bed happy now.

TGIF: The Dalai Lama walks into a pizza shop… June 16, 2011

Chris Durban shared this little video with me, which a friend of hers in Australia sent her, because she thought it would make a good TGIF video. As Chris explains, it is “a good example of a cultural mismatch, with (as he [her friend] put it) “the joke being on the Australian TV presenter trying to be funny.” :-)” For those of you who don’t get it either, I will explain the joke below the video window.

My favorite line is “You know that a joke’s in trouble when you’ve got a translator off to the side.” Truer words have never been spoken.

To those non-native speakers who, like the Dalai Lama, have no idea what he’s going on about, the joke is when he says “make me one with everything.” It’s a pun (meaning it has 2 meanings): 1) Make me a pizza with everything 2) Make me at harmony with everything (which according to the Buddhist tenet the ultimate goal is to become one with the world and be at peace through meditation.

TGIF: Bradley Cooper speaks French? June 2, 2011

Who knew? This video is being featured on all the Hollywood gossip blogs I follow and is being met with shock that Bradley Cooper is fluent in French.

As my favorite blogger stated:

I think as Americans, we are used to everyone only speaking English. We cannot fathom that everyone in the world does not speak English and I think we are equally as shocked when someone from America who does not actually come from another country can speak a language fluently other than English. And no, asking how much a beer costs in Spanish is not being fluent.

So, to be a stereotypical as the world sees us American, I was shocked to discover that not only does Bradley Cooper speak French, he does it brilliantly. I promise that even though you might not understand a word of this, you will have a new found respect for Bradley Cooper. Not for the way he treats women, you will still have that bias, rightfully so, but for the language ability. I have watched this thing like five times already.

We know that it isn’t that shocking for someone to speak another language, but it is rare that an actor – let alone a very well-known actor – can speak another language and do it well. At least I am assuming he does it well. Well, fellow French speakers, what say you?

TGIF: Uma Thurman markets Schweppes in France May 27, 2011

Celebrities market products overseas all the time. It’s a great way to make some cash while cashing in on their popularity. Arnold Schwarzenegger crazily hawking some product in Japan is a favorite I posted two years ago here on the blog. This sexy ad featuring Uma Thurman is a Schweppes commercial that is currently airing on French TV. In the ad Ms. Thurman can’t stop huskily explaining her wanton desire to have Schweppes constantly, with anyone, anywhere. This kind of commercial would be accompanied by all kinds of protests by the prudes in the U.S. 🙂 Enjoy!

TGIF: Ducati and Xerox May 5, 2011

This video was shared on the GLD list the other day. It makes fun of the ridiculous demands we translators sometimes hear. Ducati focuses on the bikes, while Xerox focuses on the technical communications – and that’s the way it should be.

TGIF: Madonna Interview March 4, 2011

I had the text of this interview on my original website for a long time. It cracked me up when I read it, and it cracks me up even more that French & Saunders can barely read through it without totally losing it with laughter. When Madonna was in Budapest, Hungary filming the movie Evita, she was interviewed by the Budapest newspaper Blikk. The questions were posed in Hungarian, then translated into English for Madonna, whose replies were then translated back into Hungarian for the article. Shortly thereafter, at the request of USA Today, Madonna’s comments were then retranslated from Hungarian back into English for the benefit of that paper’s readers. To say that something was lost in the process is to be wildly ungrateful for all that was gained.

Luckily, since I never delete files… here is the original print of the interview for those of you having trouble following the interview due to the mangled language and laughs from French & Saunders. Enjoy!

“I Am a Tip-Top Starlet”

In which something is lost, but much is gained, in the translation

When the huge Evita production company blew into Budapest last month to rent its ancient architecture, Madonna, the film’s star, was much too busy staying in character to meet with the local press. Finally, on the eve of her departure, good manners prevailed, and the pop diva submitted to an interview with the Budapest newspaper Blikk.

Here is the complete transcript:

Blikk: Madonna, Budapest says hello with arms that are spread-eagled. Did you have a visit here that was agreeable? Are you in good odor? You are the biggest fan of our young people who hear your musical productions and like to move their bodies in response.

Madonna: Thank you for saying these compliments [holds up hands]. Please stop with taking sensationalist photographs until I have removed my garments for all to see [laughs]. This is a joke I have made.

Blikk: Madonna, let’s cut toward the hunt: Are you a bold hussy-woman that feasts on men who are tops?

Madonna: Yes, yes, this is certainly something that brings to the surface my longings. In America it is not considered to be mentally ill when a woman advances on her prey in a discotheque setting with hardy cocktails present. And there is a more normal attitude toward leather play-toys that also makes my day.

Blikk: Is this how you met Carlos, your love-servant who is reputed? Did you know he was heaven-sent right off the stick? Or were you dating many other people in your bed at the same time?

Madonna: No, he was the only one I was dating in my bed then, so it is a scientific fact that the baby was made in my womb using him. But as regards these questions, enough! I am a woman and not a test-mouse! Carlos is an everyday person who is in the orbit of a star who is being muscle-trained by him, not a sex machine.

Blikk: May we talk about your other “baby”, your movie, then? Please do not be denying that the similarities between you and the real Evita are grounded in basis. Power, money, tasty food, Grammys – all these elements are afoot.

Madonna: What is up in the air with you? Evita never was winning a Grammy!

Blikk: Perhaps not. But as to your film, in trying to bring your reputation along a rocky road, can you make people forget the bad explosions of Whos’s That Girl? and Shanghai Surprise?

Madonna: I am a tip-top starlet. That is my job that I am paid to do.

Blikk: O.K., here’s a question from left space: What was your book Slut about?

Madonna: It was called Sex, my book.

Blikk: Not in Hungary. Here it was called Slut. How did it come to be publish? Were you lovemaking with a man-about-town printer? Do you prefer making suggestive literature to fast-selling CDs?

Madonna: These are different facets to my career highway. I am preferring only to become respected all over the map as a 100% artist.

Blikk: There is so much interest in you from this geographic region, so I must ask this final questions: How many Hungarian men have you dated in bed? Are they No. 1? How are they comparing to Argentine men, who are famous for being tip-top as well?

Madonna: Well, to avoid aggravating global tension, I would say it’s a tie [laughs]. No, no, I am serious now. See here, I am working like a canine all the way around the clock! I have been too busy even to try the goulash that makes your country one for the record books.

Blikk: Thank you for your candid chit-chat.

Madonna: No problem, friend who is a girl.

TGIF: Bill Cosby and the alphabet February 25, 2011

Sesame Street always gets the best guests to star in their clips. This one is from the 1970s and features Bill Cosby reciting the alphabet. I love the faint line you can see between the old school split-screen. Nowadays, it’d be perfect and you’d think there was really two of them. Enjoy your Friday, everyone. I for one will be working all weekend to try to get some headway on the big jobs on my desk. No rest for the wicked. Glad today is a snow day here in Cleveland. I have an excuse to stay home, stay warm and work. I already helped push the mail delivery woman’s van out of a snowdrift this morning.